More Embarrassing Moments

• My dog, Sharpie, liked to beep the car horn while I shopped. I was constantly hearing over the loud speakers, “Will the owner of a white station wagon with a small black dog in it please report to the courtesy desk? Your dog is beeping the horn and appears to be VERY UNHAPPY.” (He was never left for long periods of time and, yes, he had the air conditioner on, as well as the radio. He just liked to bring attention to himself).—Lorrie DeWitt

• Today my dog ripped my pants off… I was on my own front porch so it wasn’t that bad, but it was pretty funny. —Jesse Yasuda

• My dog Kodi and I were driving down the main street in the small college town that we lived in. He was in the back seat enjoying the wind in his ears when we stopped at a light. He proceeded to jump out of the back window and go to the side of the road and take the biggest poop I have seen in my life. This was during rush hour. I freaked out and jumped out of the car after him, leaving my car in the middle of the road. He seemed to care less about the whole ordeal and just jumped back into the car like nothing was wrong. We got lots of honks and now Mommy always gives him just enough room to put his head out of the window, nothing more.—Jess Dove

• My first service dog, Kiwi, was a character with a mind of her own. When training her to hit a pre-programmed 911 button for emergencies, we knew there would be some stress when EMS came barreling through the door, so we had police friends come help us. Kiwi would practice calling 911, they would come in simulating an emergency, then give Kiwi a treat. After a very cold day, I ran a hot bath to warm up. I was fostering kittens and they were in my very large bathroom so I closed the door. I was relaxing in the hot bath when I heard a huge commotion in my apartment and suddenly the police officers I know were standing over my butt-naked self. It seems Kiwi wanted a snack and hit the 911 button.—Lisa Cullen

• My girlfriend’s parents had just moved into the beautiful new house they’d been building for what seemed like forever. Anya, my well-trained GSD mix, and I visited for the first time at Christmas. Anya’s very first action when we arrived was to head straight for their bedroom, jump up on their bed and pee (at great length) all over the brand new bed and comforter, something she’d never done at our house. Happy Holidays… 

• Penny is a Corgi mix and a good girl. But, a few years back, she ran out the front door when I was taking out the garbage. Worried that she might get hit by a car, I went into panic mode. It was nighttime and I had been cleaning. I ran into the hallway and grabbed the first pair of shoes in sight, black pumps I had kicked off after work. I slipped them on, grabbed her leash, and frantically looked for something that might entice her to come to me. Seconds later, I was running down the street in a pair of denim shorts, a stained tee-shirt and high heels whilst squeezing a squeaky rubber turkey drumstick and shouting, “Pen-ny.” About six neighbors in a nearby driveway all stopped mid-conversation to gape as I caught up to Penny and walked her home in as dignified manner as possible.—Barbara Bullington

• I was widowed at a young age, and my beloved mixed breed, Casey, was my world after my husband died. Several months after my husband’s death, a close friend persuaded me to go out to a club with him to hear a local band. When he came to pick me up, he had brought along his friend who was in Grad school and was also looking for a night out. The Grad student was the most handsome and charming guy. We spent the evening together and it was an instant connection. When we returned to my home, I opened the front door only to be greeted by 40 pounds of potting soil that Casey had ripped open and drug across the living room floor. I was so embarrassed and thought there was no way this guy would every call me again. Long story short, we have been happily married for 22 years!—Julie Webster

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