Each year my friends and I embark on a weekend camping excursion into the wilds to enjoy the laid back and carefree lifestyle associated with sleeping outdoors. Within this group of unsavory characters are other dog enthusiasts who, like me, insist upon imposing their four legged children onto our other, less dog-devoted pals. This makes for a tantalizing mix of dogs barking, humans scolding, and general pandemonium. To try and avoid some of these stressful pitfalls, I’ve formulated strategies and discovered products that help to reduce my anxiety (these, of course, are in addition to hard liquor).

Although Roxy, Cash and Chance were already familiar with Kuma (a sweet, rock-obsessed black lab mix) and Charlie (a refined and genteel chocolate lab), this was their first introduction to Norman, a slack tongued, energetic, territorial Pug/Shih Tzu mix who fancies nothing better than a tennis ball and a pretty lady (in this case, Roxy). Despite having come to blows over the lone tennis ball, this flat-faced duo took an immediate liking to each other, and at certain points had to be separated to preserve Roxy’s decency. It was at this point that it dawned on us that Roxy was the lone female.

Tip #1 – bring more than one tennis ball and protective gear for Roxy

While we artificially-soled humans weren’t bothered by the rocky beach, many of the larger fellas (Cash, Kuma and Charlie) wound up with aching tootsies from their extended play on the gravely shore. It was a good thing I came prepared with my doggie first aid-kit which contained an ample supply of baby aspirin to help soothe the big boys’ feet.

Tip #2 – bring a comfy Chill Pad from P.L.A.Y for them to rest their paws on and don’t make fun of Charlie’s Muttluks boots

While we were all indulging in fire roasted wieners and potato chips, we misguidedly expected our dogs to stick to their regimented diets of dry kibble. We were wrong.

Tip #3 – pack extra wieners and don’t bother with dog dishes

We had high hopes that Chance’s persnickety personality would have improved after his neutering. Once more, we were mistaken. He bit one friend as she kindly helped him onto his bed, leaving her with angry looking red marks that ought to have been left by an incompetent vampire as opposed to a tiny dog. Despite having witnessed this terrifying display, another friend asked permission to pet him which I gladly granted. Chance nearly took his finger off.

Tip #4 – keep everyone a safe distance away from Chance

By the end of the weekend, my dogs smelled terrible. After swimming in the lake, rolling in muck, lying next to the fire and eating terrible human food, I could not stand the idea of putting them into the backseat of my brand new (leased) car.

Tip #5 – cover them in M&J Dog’s pre-shampoo treatment, toss them in the lake and get a Soggy Dog car seat cover

As an experienced camper-with-dogs, I can confidently assure you that these tips and tactics will help make your outdoor doggie adventures easier and safer. Good luck and keep on ruffin’ it!